What I learned over vacation

The past few weeks have been very busy and I decided I would resume my writing following my vacation. I figured this would be the perfect time to get right with my mind, body and God. I had nine straight days off, I felt like nothing could go wrong. Turns out I was wrong.

This was a tough week. I don’t want to go in to specifics publicly but many people in our lives went through very painful, life altering moments. We really struggled trying to help people out, while also holding our own lives together.  The truth is life can’t stop just because you want it to. I feel so blessed that while my fiancé and I are witnessing these events happen to people we care about, we are not the ones going through them.

On top of everything, this was the first father’s day without my Dad, who died last year of a heart attack. This weekend, I took a lot of my frustration out on God. I struggle with anxiety, depression and anger. Often times I wonder why can’t he just take it all from me? Why was I made to be different? Is my faith not strong enough to rid me of the things that burden my mind?

I realized God still loves all of us no matter what. Whether you are an angry Christian whose faith is tested, or a person whose faith is always strong, maybe you gave your life to Christ just recently. He even loves the atheists who angrily refuse him. I can say this, no matter how many times I get angry with God, which leads to me being ashamed or like a failure, I feel his love and presence in my life. The Lord makes me stronger each day, even when I feel weak. I can’t begin to express how important God is in my life. If you haven’t given your life to Christ today, don’t worry about the past, he forgives you. Let’s start a new life today.

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